To The Readers
(Update: It's here! Scroll down to read our latest offering.)
Yes, all five of you. I just want to apologize for the delay in posting the usual witty, incisive, and insightful review of Brooks's latest abomination. I know that the light has been driven from your lives over the past couple of days; that you check this website, trembling in a fever of anticipation, every five minutes, only to be cast down into a deep depression when you find nothing new (update: SiteMeter informs me that such is not the case. Apparently, you guys are a bunch of lazy bums). Well, I'm sorry to have to withhold your fix for another day, but I felt that, out of respect for the Pope, I ought to hold off on my attack on Brooks for a few days. (What? April Fools Day was Friday? Whoops, my bad.) Actually, the delay has two reasons: first of all, this latest column proved to be the straw that broke Ted's back. He could no longer remain silent in the face of Brooks's continued idiocy, so the next review will be about half Ted, which is good, but since we live a few hundred miles apart, the necessary collaboration delayed things some. However, the main reason that the next review won't appear until tomorrow is the NCAA tournament, which, combined with a busy Sunday, has held me back. Incidentally, I picked UNC before the tournament started, and they better win, because they're about the only part of the tournament that I did pick right. But how will I get through the next 24 or so hours, you cry? Well, if you get the shakes, you can always go through the archive.